Present at the momentous happenings such as: Macmillan's speech, Verwoerd's
assassination, Vorster's rise to power and PW Botha's coup.
She became SA Ambassador to the Independent Black homeland Republic of
Bapetikosweti in 1983.
Evita assisted Pik Botha in the Total Diplomatic Onslaught on the world
during the 80's.
She is the best babotie maker in South Africa.
Evita is known for her TV chat show FUNIGALORE, which was her contribution to
the RDP: reconstructuring prejudice and developing compassion.
Toward the end of the 1970's, I was writing a weekly column for the Sunday
Express in Johannesburg. It was during the time of the Information Scandal,
which led to the eventual fall of John Vorster and the rise of PW Botha. The
land was abuzz with rumours of embezzlements, thefts, even murder - but because
of the ever-increasing paranoia about press control and censorship, it was not
possible to write about these things.
So I created a character in my column out of whose mouth these rumours /
facts dripped like warm honey. She was the wife of a Nationalist NW, someone on
the fringes of power but elbow-deep in the catering, so she knew all the ins and
outs. For 3 years she appeared about once a month, informing the nation of the
stench under the cloak of respectability and no-one stopped her (me). Someone
even gave her a name: "The Evita of Pretoria".
When I started my one-man show "Adapt or Dye" in April 1982, I gave
this creature a physical reality - eyelashes, high heels and handbag - and she
has never looked back! Right from the start "Tannie Evita" stepped out
of the chorus line and took off into folklore, leaving behind the many other
characters I did in my shows.
The public wanted more of her all the time, so I created more around her -
her husband Hasie and her three children. I played them all on stage in
"Farce about Uys" and on film in "Skating on thin Uys".
The absurdity of the homeland system cried out for attention and so she
became its most famous ambassador. Even during 2 years when I stopped performing
her - fearing she would swamp me with her forcefulness - the public didn't
notice. Mrs Evita Bezuidenhout was alive and living among them, in spite of me!
I introduced her to audiences in Australia, the United Kingdom, Canada,
Holland, Germany and Scandinavia. She became as confident on foreign soil as she
was in her own backyard. People wrote to her, promising to support her in her
legal efforts to control that "third-rate satirist Pieter-Dirk Uys"
who was so cruelly making fun of her.
Politicians wrote too. Minister Pik Botha faxed her, Archbishop Desmond Tutu
kissed her on the cheek and danced the toyi-toyi with her in his garden.
Designers designed for her. I dieted because of her.
Originally the idea for a biography on Evita centred around a few recipes and
funny pictures, but once five years of research into the fascinating detail of
South African politics had passed, I realised that Evita's biography was not
just the story of a woman, or the story of a nation. It was, in many cases, the
story of our lives.
Living Legacy
Award
Tannie Evita was recently awarded the Living Legacy 2000 Award in San Diego
by the Woman's International Centre for "Her contribution to the place of
women in the last century."
While other honourees received the award for great things, Ons Tannie
received hers for the laughter and positive energy that her presence evokes.
Mother Theresa and Hilary Clinton are past honourees of this award.
Evita, non-PC superstar 
Comedy critics often use the term "hard hitting" when we mean
"not funny". It allows us to acknowledge someone's moral integrity
while hiding the fact that we didn't actually laugh our socks off. It also
proves that, in Britain at least, satire has taken a back seat to non-political
humour.
In South Africa, no such luxury exists, as Pieter-Dirk Uys proved again last
night. In a show which could have filled several pages of any dictionary of
political quotations he flicked from one character to another, all of them
trying to make sense of the aftermath o the apartheid, a creed which, as he
says, "Was so successful we couldn't kill it off: we sold it to
Yugoslavia."
It's slightly disorientating, but rather exciting to sit in a theatre and
hear unfamiliar cultural references whizzing over one's head straight to their
target. I couldn't, for example, say what was funny about "toyi-toying with
sacred cows", though it provoked a roar of laughter from more informed
audience members.
Chief villain of the evening, is the K-word, standing for the hated term
"Kaffir". "I used to say the K-word", hisses one former
apartheid apologist," but I can't say it in the new South Africa - I'd lose
my job." Why? "My manager is one".
Uys has never shied away from putting on a dress to make a point. We have
Lily Savage, but Afrikaners have Evita Bezuidenhout, the housewife mega-star and
doyenne of political incorrectness. She salutes the new President of South
Africa, Thabo Mbeki, "I did all the catering for his inauguration. Well, I
had to, there was no one left in the kitchen - they were all in
parliament!" It is a familiar Uys tactic, but is still devastating.
Evita was hard at work in the recent election - for real, telling villages
about the importance of voting. There, she told us, one 18-year-old boy stood up
and said "Madam, we fought for freedom and all we got was democracy."
There are many such pungent points, nor is our own system spared. Uys always
does his homework, and anyone from the Dome or the Passport Office will have to
endure some uncomfortable moments. Meanwhile, any inspiring political comedians
should camp outside the bos office, and bring a notebook and pen.
"Dekaffirnated" (Tricycle Theatre) EVENING STANDARD by Alexander
Games
Tackling the big K-word
Pieter-Dirk Uys (pronounced "Ace"), the white South African
satirist, is nothing if not even-handed. His impersonation of a slobbering PW
Botha is just as funny as his doddery Nelson Mandela.
The title of his new show incorporates the unspeakable "K" word,
though the subtitle, "Calling a Spade a Spade", implies the pitfalls
of frank expression in the new liberal dispensation. The key line is the cry
that we fought for freedom but all we got was democracy. And Uys's white
supremacists - some of whom now claim to have been "in the struggle" -
admit that apartheid was a terrible mistake no one told them about.
Chief wriggler is the magnificent Evita Bezuidenhout, the Edna Everage of
Jo'burg, fresh from a royal cocktail party, in shimmering black feathers and
long red fingernails. Dressed to kill, or at least resemble Margaret Lockwood,
Evita is the star in a gallery of displaced whites brought to vivid life with
quick costume changes and wig switches. Uys injects real politics in to the
laddish, cosy world of stand-up comedy. And you learn a lot about his uneasily
developing country in two hours of satirical delight.
"Dekaffirnated" (Tricycle Theatre) DAILY MAIL by Michael Coveney
Satire is alive and well and living in South Africa
Political Stand-up comedy in this country is like voting Tory at a general
election: a decidedly passé kind of thing to do. In South Africa, by contrast,
people have never had the luxury of taking politics for granted. Even five years
after the end of the apartheid, politics still infuses every nook and cranny of
South African life. So it is hardly surprising that the leading comedian from
that country, Pieter-Dirk Uys, should be a biting political satirist. He is now
so used to the political arena that he recently performed in the South African
Parliament as his most famous creation, Mrs. Evita Bezuidenhout, South Africa's
answer to Dame Edna Everage. As he himself remarked, "I mean, please, can
you see Lily Savage in the House of Commons?"
As Evita, he also fronted a 10 000 kilometre, 60-city voter education
campaign before the general election last month. Uys has been a regular
performer in London over the last decade, but his latest show,
"Dekaffirnated", is perhaps his most moving work yet. It underlines
how hopes for the brave new world of the Rainbow Nation have in many cases been
cruelly dashed. "We quit a successful democracy", he reckons,
"because we're all equally pissed off."
The most powerful sections of the show recount the voter apathy Uys
encountered on his nationwide tour in the ballot bus.
Urging a black woman in a remote village to vote, he was unceremoniously
buffed, "Why must I vote those fat cats back into the job, when they
haven't given me a job?" In another off-the-beaten-track community centre,
a young black man in the audience stood up and told Uys, "We fought for
freedom and all we got was democracy."
In the character sketches of various South Africans that comprise the show,
Uys demonstrates the frequent absurdity of politics. Language, for instance, has
been distorted beyond recognition in the politically-correct, post-apartheid
South Africa. When a bus is stolen in a township these days, "We call it
affirmative commuting". Like all the best political comedians, Uys deftly
intermingles light and shade, finding humour in subjects where by rights there
shouldn't be any.
Who would have thought that a comedy show could include a routine about a
white policeman telling Desmond Tutu's Truth and Reconciliation Commission the
way he mistreated black female prisoners? When apartheid came to an end many
predicted that Uys's satirical darts would be blunted.
"Dekaffirnated" (Tricycle Theatre) THE INDEPENDENT by James
Rampton
Laughing in Black and White
Political comedy in this country died with the downfall of Mrs Thatcher.
Bereft of her beté noire, comedians instead turned to surrealistic musings on
the import of, say, Thunderbirds or Raleigh Choppers. In South Africa, on the
other hand, political comedy is very much alive and kicking. The death of
apartheid just gave comics fresh targets to take aim at.
South Africa's leading satirist, Pieter-Dirk Uys, who spent years kicking
against apartheid pricks, now finds himself attacking those who are
post-rationalising their role in it. In his new show at the tricycle,
"Europeans only" - a reference to the signs that were seen all over
public places during the apartheid era - his vehicle of attack is Evita
Bezuidenhout. Dripping with the sort of spangles and sparklers that wouldn't
have looked out of place on Liberace, she is a woman who, if it ever became an
Olympic event, could win a gold medal in self-justification.
After her questionable contribution to the apartheid regime, Evita has
reinvented herself as a peace campaigner. She now claims to have clinched the
South African peace accord by feeding all sides with a pudding that stuck their
teeth together. She is over here to offer Tony Blair the recipe for the Northern
Island negotiations.
The problem is that evita's new sheep's clothing keeps slipping to reveal her
old wolf's incisors. "We don't want worldly goods like diamonds and
gold," she declares with typical grandiosity. "We just want aesthetic
things - like cheap servants." Later Evita casts a worried glance at the
servant preparing her food at the back of the stage and asks, "Are you
Xhosa? Thank heavens. I thought I had a Zulu behind me with a knife in her
hand."
Just before the interval, she implores us to contribute to the charity stall
in the foyer, "For disadvantaged Afrikaners in Pretoria", before
storming out to deal with her stroppy black driver. "I'm very good at
negotiating with people like that. I have experience of talking to blacks,"
she asserts, drawing a pistol from her handbag.
But Evita does not just make jokes at the expense of white South Africans. At
one point, she says of Nelson Mandela's long imprisonment, "He's very
grateful we kept him from Winnie all those years."
British politicians are not off-limits, either. Evita proudly states that in
South Africa, "We've had four years of democracy now - you've just
celebrated your first." And she reckons that Britons took to Nelson Mandela
because "They hadn't seen a politician they could trust for such a long
time."
Uys's show does not always make for a cosy evening out - one particularly
chilling section about the treatment of black female anti-apartheid prisoners
had me shifting uncomfortably in my seat. But "Europeans Only" reminds
us that political comedy doesn't have to be bludgeoning, blunt, broadsword; it
can be an implement sharp enough to slice biltong with.
"Laughing in Black and White" (Tricycle Theatre) THE INDEPENDENT
by James Rampton
Taking the Satire out of Africa
"Just as Americans have their unmentionable "N" word, so
today's South African has one beginning with "K", to be uttered in
public at the speaker's peril. But, of course, there are exceptions. Use is
permitted on the rarest of occasions; when one particular person mouths it, if
he or she is dressed in drag, is answered by shouts of joy, gasps of laughter
and congratulations from all quarters, Nelson Mandela included.
That person is Pieter-Dirk Uys, a performer whose gifts and intentions are so
rare nowadays he may be unique. He is a mimic, he is a comic; in Mrs Evita
Bezuidenhout he has created the most famous white woman in Africa; but above all
else, and at the same time underlying it, he is a passionate political and
social satirist.
He began as a playwright. When most of his plays were banned in South Africa
he launched his one-man shows targeting the bigoted National Party regime, a
career swerve requiring courage. But, as he says of his former targets,
"Most are now either dead, in retirement, insane, forgotten or recycled as
avid supporters of black majority rule."
For the alert satirist, while old targets may die or fade away, new ones come
hurtling into view. South Africa's new life as a democracy provides Uys with
plenty to mock and 90% of his latest programme focuses upon this. He has been a
regular visitor to Britain, performing at the "Tricycle" almost
annually for more than a decade and our political practices have never been
spared. It is not only in Pretoria that avid support can switch from, so to
speak, white to black. As Evita memorably observes in one of her throwaway
comments, "Hypocrisy is the vaseline of political intercourse…."
In the first half of the play he mostly plays himself, giving the history of
the "K" word and then a moving account of his recent tour of the
republic, visiting remote towns and townships in his ballot bus, urging people
to exercise their new right to vote. There is vividly expressed passion here and
passion of a different sort when he plays a policeman whose unreconstructed
habits of thought leak out in terrible fashion when testifying before the Truth
Commission. He catches the self-justifying stare in the eyes, just as a lopsided
scowl turns him into a sour-faced PW Botha, and a down-turned grin astonishingly
makes him Bill Clinton.
In the second half, furred and bejewelled, he gives us his casually
bold-speaking Evita and two contrasting Jewish ladies….
"Dekaffirnated" (Tricycle Theatre) THE TIMES by Jeremy Kingston